Reality Bites

Loved that show, the one with Winona Ryder and Ethan Hawke. Misappropriated the title for this entry; there's this lovely resonance about it, a poetical licence of intepretation on what reality does. I think it's all about expectations, great or otherwise. If you don't expect too much, you will never be too bitterly disappointed. Coming to Paris was an exercise in great expectations. I guess seeing, hearing, reading what other friends have waxed lyrical about their exchanges has created an irrevocable sense of expectation, of an unquenched longing for something out of the mundanity of life back home, a break from the rigidity of routine. Leaving everything behind and starting a brave new world, replete with all the struggles and joys of discovery. Of finding yourself, who you are, in a place where you make your own decisions, where you decide what you want to do with your life. Maybe that hasn't changed.

Paris is beautiful. To walk along the Seine as the sun sets, the last rays of the day casting a distant shadow on the Eiffel tower, the ghost of Notre Dame just visible in the encroaching dark. To watch the sunlight bounce off the ripples on the river as it makes it's way across the city, a ceaseless flow echoing the endless stream of life that surrounds you. To know that you're well and truly alive in this world. To just sit along the sidewalks of a cafe, watching the bustle of humanity pass you by as you fondle your petit tasse de cafe, not a care in the world, knowing that there's a time and place for everything. And that for now, this is the time and place, the time to take out those rose-tinted lenses and indulge in a moment of eternity, and there's no better place to do it. La vie en rose; Paris is all that. But like any beautiful woman who knows full well the allure of her beauty, Paris is a recondite tease. She reveals to you just enough to set your pulse racing, the rush and euphoria of seduction running through your veins; you think that maybe, just maybe, you might stand a chance with this beautiful creature. Than she turns and gives you the cold shoulder, her chill freezes the last vestiges of your amour. She is a beauty, but a terrible beauty. You can fall in love with her from afar but you can never hope to own her body and soul.

The first week settling in has been hard; Parisiens are not exactly the friendliest of people and most have little patience with you if you cannot speak the language. Not everyone is like this of course but there are enough of them to dishearten you. It's been alright for me to speak; i mean, just whack lah. There's no harm in stuttering when speaking, its a matter of confidence and willingness to try more than anything else. Apartments here are extremely expensive. A hole in the wall (which is about 7 metres square) costs around 350 euros a month, electricity and utilities not included. It's ridiculous. The rooms are miserable, small and cramped; it's like torturing yourself when you have to go back home. For a half decent one, you have to be ready to fork out over 500 to 600 euros a month. At that price back home, we can get a 4-5 room flat with change to spare. Am staying with a friend now; an illegal alien. But we're splitting the rent and its come to quite a decent amount, so its not so bad. More money to spend on important things. Like food. And hopefully a nice jacket and leather boots, when i have the impetus to go shopping.

The biggest obstacle thus far has been the University. Institut d'Etudes Politiques de Paris is not exactly the best place to relax. It's one of the best institutes in Europe for Political Science: Dominic Villepin (the French Prime Minister just in case you don't know who he is) was on our campus today, probably to comfort himself that there are students who are attending classes in this time of protests and manifestations by students. I think we are the only University in France which still has classes as the rest of the country's tertiary population is on strike over the new legislation which affects new graduates. The workload in Sciences-Po is comparable to NUS, but the students are so much more focused and honestly, much more brilliant. They know what they want to do with their lives and where exactly they're going; most of us back home are just doing our degrees for the sake of it, because society demands that we must at least have our basic degree. It's different here. Those who are still studying are doing so because they want to, not from obligation. And that makes all the difference. There is such passion and enthusiasm in the classroom that you just get sucked into it. The language has been the biggest obstacle. There is a huge international student population but most of them have been here for one semester or have at least had 4 years of French education and speak it fluently. I have only had 2years of learning the language and i'm expected to perform at the same level as them. And the lecturers speak so fast with jargon and technical terms peppering an already almost incomprehensible tongue. Have a headache everyday just trying to process the information and have to spend hours in the library trying to do research on what others take for granted. There is no room to manoeuvre, no space to cut any slack..you either sink or swim. At this point in time, all i hope to do is float. I know things will get better, but to start a race from behind, it doesn't feel good. To play perpetual catch up, it's tiring.

Have met many interesting people though, people from all over the world. Oh and one opinion still hasn't changed. Americans are hapsolutely irritating, esp the girls. Its the tone of voice that they speak in and an overall attitude. Not everyone though, there have been several really nice ones. But quite a few of them are like bleah. lack of adjectives to adequately describe them. The Eastern Europeans have this cold beauty about them but they're really nice and fun people to talk to. The Latin Americans and Spaniards are really good looking though, and a cool bunch of people on top of that; am picking up some Spanish, so heh, can add that to a list of languages that i hope to be able to speak by the end of this trip. As of now, i can say i love you in like mmm..8 languages? 9? conquista time...haha...

Ok, will update the blog with pictures of my school and the place im staying and probably several friends etc. A la prochaine fois.